COMMANDMENT VI: THOU SHALT KEEP THY OPINIONS TO THYSELF!

Holding Your Tongue (Excerpt from “The Ten Commandments of Divorce”)

“How often do we hear someone trash their former spouse so vehemently you wonder how love could ever have existed between them? Some people can’t even say their ex’s name without slanting their brows in anger or snarling in disgust. When you are a parent though, you need to remember something of primary importance; the person you may have such disdain for is the father or mother of your child. You may also want to remember that you chose this person, you married him/her, and you vowed to spend the rest of your life with them. To trash them now in front of the very people who watched you take those vows would say more about your lack of discernment than it would about their faults.”



This excerpt from my book came to mind when I watched Newt Gingrich being eviscerated by his ex-wife. She decided that Americans needed to know what kind of husband he was. You should know that I do not condone any actions by this man, nor do I endorse him as a presidential candidate. This call-out is mainly to convey an important Commandment and to stress just how dangerous trash talk is. There are victims in this real-life drama; namely, his family and children. Did she think about all the consequences before she went public? Were her motives altruistic or vindictive? Considering how she may be portrayed by the public, was this attack on his morality worth it?

He said, she said, and then there is the truth. We all know that we as humans remember the events of our lives based on the emotions we feel. The truth is, EVERYONE has participation in the direction their lives take, irrespective of how much “blame” can be put on another person. In the end, we can hope to forgive and find common ground to share for our own sake and that of our children. Although this personal attack was difficult for Newt's family, many people in America believe it was necessary to expose him and his lack of sexual discernment…and they might be right. My question is, when it comes to pointing the moral gun at a presidential candidate, who should be the one pulling the trigger?