Today would have been my Nana’s 95th birthday. This is the first time in my entire life that I am not seeing her on this day. Although I was sad waking up today, I realized when I turned on my computer and looked at the date that it was 10/22, 2012. I love numerology and immediately saw the numbers were exactly the same just scrambled. That can only happen twice; once this year and then again 2021. I knew it would be a great day. In fact, I was “counting” on it!

Anyone who has read my book will know that I was influenced all throughout my life by Nana’s gracious ways and loving heart. She was an unknowing mentor to me, and her unique way of handling her own divorce at a time that divorce was unheard of, was the example I followed during mine. There was another energy throughout my book though. As a young woman, I always felt inspired by the God Squad. Father Tom Hartman and the Rabbi Gellman were profound examples of how we could come together for the purpose of love and goodness if we made the effort. So when I wrote the first draft of the, “The Ten Commandments of Divorce,” I contacted a young Rabbi who was an author as well. I asked him to consult on certain aspects, because as a Christian, I wanted the Jewish perspective. He was happy to do it, and we joked about being the “God Squad of Divorce.”

The book was published one year ago, but just last week, I had the honor of meeting the Rabbi Gellman at a function for his partner, Tom Hartman. Although I only had one minute to talk, I was able to tell him how much I admired them both and used their “energy” when writing my own book. He handed me his card and said he would read it. I was thrilled and dropped the book off at his office the next day.
This morning I received a call from the Rabbi Gellman. “Donna, I just finished your book. I absolutely loved it! It is a great work. Please come in so we can talk about how I can help you with it!” When I got the call, I almost couldn’t speak. My heart was almost singing at the thought of my angel up there on her birthday, orchestrating my life. The woman who was always my champion here on earth, was now more powerful than ever and helping me all the more.

For the rest of the day, she showed me signs and kept validating her presence and guidance. I have no doubt that she is now “counting” on me to follow through and make her story help millions of people. It is not a stretch to say that one little woman can change the world. She has already changed mine.

Many years ago, when I was a sales person in the construction industry, I sat myself down in my boss's office and whined, "I feel like I am working nonstop and getting nowhere. I am starting to think I am lost!"

He said to me, "Donna, I see exactly where you are and what you are doing. Think of me as a helicopter pilot and I am hovering over the forest you are in. I see you clearly chopping away at every tree in your way, and you are creating a perfectly straight line heading right for your destination. Don't fear that it is all for nothing. You are making great progress. You will be out of the woods soon enough!"

And in fact, he was right. Not long after, I reached the “tipping point” and sales soared. I will never forget his encouraging words, but there was something else very important that I gleaned from that day...the knowingness that even though I felt lost and couldn't see the “forest from the trees,” I was still going exactly where I needed to go. My goal and motive were so clear that nothing could stand in my way…not even myself.

We all have the power to see what isn't there; to envision our dream; to bring in whatever we need to accomplish our goals. We just have to keep remembering that the physical part of ourselves is not our ultimate power…it houses our ultimate power. Just let go of what you “think” you need to do in order to “feel” and “hear” direction. The person in the helicopter exists within YOU.

Is there such a thing as MODERATION?

Recently I was invited to become part of a business group on Long Island that had created a committee dedicated to wellness issues in schools and businesses. Sounded like a great fit so I volunteered to become part of the discussions. In a short time I received an email telling of the next meeting and the topics that would be discussed, namely, developing wellness programs in schools, educating business owners about employee health issues, speaking with hospitals and doctors about how we can cut insurance costs. The email ended with a last note: “bagels will be served.”

If it were any kind of traditional business function, the idea of serving bagels would cause a slight reaction in me, but this was a meeting about wellness. As far as I was concerned, serving bagels at a wellness breakfast was no different than serving beer at an AA meeting. After all, if we are going to educate people, especially children, shouldn’t we be practicing what we preach?

I quickly sent back an RSVP that I would attend, but politely suggested that we might consider serving fruit instead of bagels since it is a discussion about health. The director, a young woman in her twenties, responded with, “Donna, Everything in moderation!”  I think it was the smiley face that did it for me. I wrote back a bunch of reasons why the words bagel and moderation would never fit in the same sentence for most people, including those with gluten intolerance, diabetes and stomach issues like IBS, Crohn’s and Ulcerative Colitis. I then added, “If this group really believes in creating change, shouldn’t we start with the very meetings that we are using to create that change?”

After a couple more paragraphs I concluded with, “We have to walk, talk and act as if we are the very people we are trying to help and empower. I’m sorry, but if we are in crisis, moderation just won’t cut it. Please email if you would like some healthy options. I am anxious to help the cause.” Sorry to say, I never got a response from her or anyone else from the organization. When I arrived at the meeting, not only were bagels present, there were also pastries and muffins.

Initially my response to complacency about the state our Country’s health is in is shock. I can’t say anger or judgment because I understand that most people just don’t know enough about the human body to make the right choices for themselves. However, when given an “expert” opinion and information gained from years of research, how do you ignore it? Obviously, I didn’t join the group, but it wasn’t because they ignored my email. It was because they are not motivated to lead by example and I believe that is the only way we are ever going to create real change amongst ourselves and our children.

Am I acting like some Don Quixote, fighting issues that don’t exist? Fifteen years ago, people told me I was crazy fighting for clean air and a reprieve from second-hand smoke. They don’t think I am so crazy now. The food issues in this Country are real and we, the people that make up the population, are the only answer to the problem. Unless we stop eating and serving the junk, the food companies will continue to make them and never come up with better choices for us and our kids. It is up to us. It always has been.

Simple solution for us all to follow: ALWAYS serve wholesome foods at every business function. It’s easy! There are many caterers that will be happy to offer healthy choices and if your source doesn’t, then you change vendors. Unless we stop eating what we know is not good for us, we will never be able to change the unhealthy course our kids are on, and that is no windmill I am fighting. That is fact. D.